When I look deep inside me, I'm almost afraid by the number of conservative, xenophobic instincts I have. Would you believe I'm highly homophobic, racist and a few other things I don't dare pronounce out loud? Yet, I don't want to be any of those. Letting those instincts out would be my worst nightmare, hence the main reason why I avoided getting drunk at all costs (and grew up to hate most alcoholic beverages as a result). Why don't these parts of me just go away? I know I want them to.